Stupid Criminals: Man Steals Laxatives Thinking They Were Opioids

Photo: Pinellas County Sheriff's Office

A man in Florida stole some medication out of his roommate's lockbox. They were labelled Hydrocodone. But, they weren't. They weren't opioids. They were laxatives. And yes, he did find out the hard way.

His roommate called the cops when the pills went missing. He admitted he stole them and then threw the rest out. So, not only did he get a horrible stomach ache, he was publicly humiliated... and arrested.

Also in Florida, a guy was with him wife. She was upset over an issue she was having with a family member. She wanted to talk about it with him, but he went into Taco Bell and got himself lunch instead. When he got, he tried to give his wife a burrito. But he was dangling it in front of her, making fun of her for being so upset. That wasn't a smart move... she grabbed it and threw it on the floor.

Apparently, that's a fighting act. He picked up the burrito and shoved it in her face and up her nose. He was arrested for battery... by a burrito.

And finally in Kansas, a family was playing monopoly and wound up getting into a fight. It escalated and as two cousins were arguing, one guy's girlfriend hit the other cousin and shoved him into a mirror. Then she took off running. The guy went to the hospital for stitches but they are still looking for the girlfriend who is now wanted on assault charges. And you know, when they catch her, she will have to go directly to jail... without passing go... and without collecting her 200 dollars.

 
Chuck and Kelly

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